Who wants a divorce?

Always fun to come across these:


DIVORCE AGREEMENT

Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, Obama supporters, et al:We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.Here is a model separation agreement:Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effort les sly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, how ever, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them).We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have your beloved home les s, homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We'll keep the Bib les and give you NBC and Hollywood . You can make nice with Iran and Pa les tine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security.We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values... You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N.. But we will no longer be paying the bill. We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find. You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing doctors. We'll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right. We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World. We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty your best shot. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag. Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you ANWAR which one of us will need whose help in 15 years..

Sincerely, John J. Wall
Law Student and an American

P.S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand & Jane Fonda with you.

Vote For McCain

Captain Complete says Vote for McCain!!! Captain complete also wants you to know, due to overcrowding at the polls, voters are being asked to vote on different days. If you are voting Republican, please vote on Nov. 4th. If you are voting Democrat, please vote on Nov. 5th. If you do not follow these stipulations, Captain Complete will dump Gatorade on your head.

Conspiracy Theory

I have figured it out!!! Washington and the media have conspired against us, the common people. They have used the party lines to turn us against each other. How many times have you heard "I am not satisfied by either candidate."? Yet, we (Republicans, Democrats) are unable to unite to change our environment. Instead we spend our time personally attacking each other and our respective candidates. Our elected officials and media (both sides) continue to fuel this behavior because they know that is the way for them to stay in power, and keep making money at the tax payer's expense. Why do you think we are only seeing negative ads instead of policy debates? Unless we can get over the grade school like mentality we currently exhibit, things are never going to change.


I need more coffee, or more sleep.

A weekend off?

Somehow I ended up ahead in regard to studying, and now I get the weekend off. How great is that? Now I get to head to the Troyer's annual corn roast (always a great time), watch the Buckeyes and hang out in sweatpants all weekend. Well, let's face it, Sunday will be the day to work on my "honey-do" list. It is, at least, finally getting shorter. Who is enjoying the conventions (Republican/Democrat)? I have not watched much of either, I mean, who needs a week-long informercial from either party? It's going to get ugly in the upcoming months, and my goal is to avoid discussing politics/religion/weight-loss with friends and family. It always ends up as a fight, or them giving me lame diet tips (I need my carbs, people!).
So, does anyone need a place to live? I have a house for sale (big house), or rent on the east of Columbus. Let me know.

Have a good one, and go Bucks.

Palin for VP, I like it

It's a battle of the minorities, you gotta luv it. So if you are a Democratic woman (or Black Republican), who do you vote for? Everyone seems caught up in making history, but what is really best for the country? I happen to have a soft spot for children with disabilities from my days helping out in a school for children with disabilities, and Palin has a son with Down Syndrome. So as long as everyone is throwing their votes to the wind in the name of history, that is where I am throwing mine. McCain may be a bit liberal for my taste, but Palin is a mom, and everyone listens to mom. And hey, she's pro-life and that happens to agree with my Bible.

In case you didn't know, that is here now, and back in the 80's as a sportscaster. A sportscaster!!! I am telling you this woman is perfect for the White House.

Moving...

If you don't have a soul, this may not effect you. http://www.whatkindofworlddoyouwant.com/videos/view/id/706270

It puts things in perspective.